The Captian goes down with the ship

There is alot more reusable garbage in the middle of the ocean than a person may guess. Ship wrecks, pieces of sea-side homes dragged out here by hurricane.

Ive managed to build an extention and sheltered area onto my raft  with drift wood and rope from a fishing net that I actually jumped off the raft (again) to collect. Ive been using the rest of the net to catch fish for food.

Fearful storms come and mask nite into day with black cloud cover. Terrifying winds disgard my crude shelter into shambles. But, I hold tight to all I can with antisipation for an enevidable return to calm waters and clear skies.

Gethsemeni

I felt The Spirit of God fill me. So, I thought I could walk on water.
The Light of My Creators Love shined into my eyes. So, I thought I could see forever.
Jesus wept. So do I.

Prayer

Dear, Heavenly Father.

                     I think Ive made mistakes again. I need your help. Ive set myself adrift on a vast and lonely ocean. I have set fire to everything I have ever reasoned and cast myself from the shore of that burning island. That IS what you wanted me to do, rite? I understand there is no return. 

                     I hear your voice in claps of thunder and I feel comfort through even the harshest midnite storm. I cannot deny that I am fortunate, none the less.

                     I daydream about the novelty in shallow water. This water that surrounds me, is darker than mortality. This water that surrounds me, is deeper than all comprehension. To truely grasp its depth would mean certain death. 

                     I feel your breath as wind that churns the tides and pushes currents that guide me with care and persission towards a new conscienceness. Fulfillment, peace and happiness await. I believe.

                    Thank you 

Beyond

These ocean currents have pulled me in every direction. The sun has set and risen again on every horizion. I believe there is no saviour for me now, other than my own sheer force of will. I have drifted so far past the edges of my imagination, even the mermaids and monsterous sea creatures that followed me have regressed towards firmilliar waters.