I miss you so much

"I miss you so much", she types.  Surely, she is not typing to me. Of course, she is not.  Thats rediculous.  I mean, I am a wonderful man and it is a tragedy to have thrown away such a blessing.  But, how can you miss something you never wanted to begin with?  No.  Surely, she is not missing me.

"I miss you so much", she types.  No, she's not missing me.  All she ever did was try to get away from me.  All she ever did was push me away.  How could she miss me when all she ever did was ignore, neglect and reject me?

Well, I maybe wrong......

Her father left when she was a young child.  So, she made me go away forever, as well.  An attempt to explain that almost forgotten childhood memory.  Maybe she does miss me.  It maybe all she knows how to do.  She is most comfortable when expressing herself through a filter of sorrow.

I dont want to be missed.  I want to be loved.  Beyond everything and no matter what.  Totally only and forever fully.  Come to me, running as fast as you can, with arms wide open and full of hope.

You see, it is hard to miss someone when you do that.  So, maybe she does type "I miss you so much" for me to read.  As long as I have been loving her, all she ever wanted to do was miss me.  No, I want to be loved.

She also types, "What I dont miss... I forgot.".